Can We Please Move On?

Sorry I haven’t been around much lately. I’m easily distracted by shiny things. -The Tick

I have a love/hate relationship with the TV. It can be a wonderful, informative tube of illumination. It can be entertaining and smart and clever and insightful and can bring a whole host of Good Things to the average TV viewer willing to plop down in front of it and pay attention for a scant few minutes. 

And then there’s the other 99.9% of junk that’s on TV. With that junk, I include the Michael Jackson coverage. For crying out loud, that man hasn’t been musically relevant in years. His life, of late, was mostly a sad circus act played out in front of a too-attentive media. And frankly, I just don’t care.

ELSEWHERE:

TRO compares Michael Jackson to Obama. I wish I’d thought of that.

I agree with Cranky-D. What about nuclear power, bitches?

Pam is bored. Me too. I just want to know if her hubby knows about all the angels kissing her knees…

Jonolan finds answers in Obama’s childhood. Hmp.  42 does not equal “government“.

History Revised, from the Self-Centered POV

Historical revisionism is alive and well in the New Socialist America.

What do you get when you have a liberal mind-set, an ambiguous moral compass, no regard for historical accuracy,  a highly-paid team of “comic” writers, a high sense of self-regard, an even higher sense of your own opinion, an infinite supply of narcissistic-colored glasses, and a thirty minute “news parody” show of your very own?  You get Jon Stewart, a man who doesn’t parody of the news nearly as much as he pushes his own personal views upon a slathering, ignorant audience.

HELLO TOPIC: Stewart thinks that Truman is a war criminal for dropping the bombs on Japan. I’ve heard this bit of nonsensical liberal revisionist history before. I’ve always felt that was worthless, but to my shame, I’ve never taken the time to do the research necessary to refute the charges.  It took Bill Whittle six minutes of googling to debunk Stewart’s ignorant assertions. Though, it did take almost seventeen minutes to explain them.

You should go watch Whittle’s PJTV video thingie. It’s a good one.

LATER: What color glasses are narcissistic-colored glasses? I suspect they’re pink. 

A LITTLE LATER: Why do conservative, logical people appear on Stewart’s show anyway? It’s nonsense and should be treated with the same respect given to silly parody shows like Reno 911!  and reality TV shows like Hogan Knows Best and Joe Millionaire. Which is to say, it should be given no respect and should not be taken seriously.

Can’t We All Just Get Along?

Apparently not.

At least, Alec Baldwin is upset at all the acrimony and bitterness:

“If John McBush and Bible Spice win, we have to find a way to come together as a country, because we can’t let it be the way it’s been the last 8 years where there’s been this acrimony and this bitterness. We have to find a way somehow to do that.”

Had he actually, you know, used McCain’s and Palin’s names instead of the ridiculous nicknames he thought up, I might be more inclined to think he was serious about wanting more peace ‘n luv in in the US.

And really, as so many people have pointed out, comparing Bush to McCain is laughable and really only serves to stir up that certain segment of the population infected with Bush Derangement Syndrome.

The WalMart Makeover

Catherine Zeta-Jones uses Wet ‘n Wild makeup*. Is she saving up money for a divorce or something? I mean, you can get enough orange Wet ‘n Wild junk at Walmart to slap on a ton of makeup for about $4.99.

My makeup looked better at my senior prom. And that was in 1993… using Wet ‘n Wild makeup…slathered on by a teenaged hand… at the end of my Goth phase.

And suddenly, as a bonus, I feel so much better about my skin. That girl’s got some serious pores.

*[Well, maybe not. It just looks like that cheap Wet ‘n Wild crap.]

Earth’s Last Eden?

Hello. I’m Prudie. And I’m a Survivor junkie.

And I’m unashamed.

Mostly, I think the show is full of shit. But it’s entertaining shit so I keep watching it season after season. I probably should have stopped after the third or so season, but it’s also addictive shit. So there’s no stopping until some sort of intervention happens… or until CBS cancels the show, whichever comes first.

This season, Survivor’s theme is “Earth’s Last Eden” and it’s being shot in Gabon, Africa. The premise is that Gabon, Africa is the last protected, untouched, unspoiled paradise on Earth. Really?

[Full Disclosure: I have nothing against Africa. It’s a continent full of greedy, drug-dealing, genocidal despots. But then, what continent isn’t?]

I have a problem with the notion of paradise being anywhere on or associated with Africa. First of all, there’s the aforementioned greedy, drug-dealing, genocidal despots. I have the general impression that they seem to have more than their fair share.

Then there’s the location itself… I dunno, I never imagined paradise having quite so many man-eating animals lurking. If Survivor footage is to be believed (and really, you can’t believe anything on Survivor to be real – still), then there are alligators/crocodiles, snakes, elephants, insects and more all waiting to gobble up the nearest homosapiens. Really, if I could design my own paradise, any animal that isn’t 100% completely in love with the idea of living in harmony with me just wouldn’t make it inside.

And I gotta admit, I never thought I’d need 50+ shots to enter paradise. Perhaps 50 is an exaggeration, but not much of one. In my own created paradise, you wouldn’t need a few series of TB or rabies vaccinations to enter.

Last, but certainly not least, I wouldn’t place paradise on a continent where squat toilets are commonplace. Ew. Paradise must surely have superb indoor plumbing.

So yeah. Paradise has to have man-loving animals, no deadly viruses, and exceptional plumbing to be paradise. Otherwise, I’ll just stay home, thanks.