What No One Wants To Say

Evangelicals hate Mormons.

There. I said it. It’s true.

It’s why Republican Evangelicals are pushing hard for a non-Romney VP.

It’s why Huckabee won damn near every Southern state in the Republican primaries.

It’s why none of the other elementary school kiddies in my small town Alabama home would have anything to do with me.

It’s why I was kicked out of the Fellowship of Christian Athletes in high school.

It’s why I found anti-Mormon pamphlets in my locker and on my car in high school.

Yeah, a word about those anti-Mormon pamphlets I found back then… there was some flack from Mormons in the primaries about Huckabee questioning whether Mormons believed Jesus and Satan are brothers. His words (“Don’t Mormons believe that Jesus and Satan are brothers?”) were also the heading of several of those pamphlets I found littered about where ever I was known to hang out. That’s why Mormons (and I) were so angered by Huckabee’s “question.” It wasn’t a question. It was code speak for “my preacher said that those guys are cultists who don’t think that the devil is the bad guy.” He was reminding Evangelicals of what they heard at the pulpit about Mormons.

As for Huckabee’s “knowledge” about Mormons, well, he gave a major speech at a Baptist conference in Salt Lake City, Utah in 1998. The main thrust of the conference was aimed towards Mormonism. Pamphlets were passed out. They went door to door (in a parody of Mormon Missionary activity) to “save” Mormons from themselves.

So I don’t buy that Huckabee knows little about Mormons. Every Evangelical I went to public school with “knew” about Mormons and the “evil” they represent.

Oh, and here’s how I feel about Mormons, in case any clarification is needed. (The short: I heart Mormons so no Mormon bashing allowed on my blog!)

And yeah, I do take Huckabee’s antics personally. And I take support for Huckabee personally. That kind of bigotry caused me all kinds of hell as a child. And to think that it is still being perpetuated makes my blood boil.

Climate Change Oscillations

NASA says that rises in temperature are not due to CO2. Instead, it’s the Pacific Ocean’s fault:

What this means is no matter how much you change your CO2 footprint, how much you try to be CO2 green, no matter how much liberal governments tax you – you cannot save the planet from its natural cycles.

If I were not recuperating from the effects of a serious case of Food Poisoning del Taco Bell, rest assured, I would be doing my happy dance.

Ya know, I bet there are still going to be people out there who will continue to take the green pill. Especially now since there’s a whole industry dependant upon a continued belief of the issue. I mean, even HGTV has “green” shows touting to help us save the world from the pestilence that is people. There are events centered around “green” themes that bring a whole lot of money to the organizers and such. They (and others) aren’t going to give up that revenue easily. Especially since so many “green” products are more expensive.

Job Fair Prep

AAAAARRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!

So. There is a job fair tomorrow for engineering/technical types. At least, there’s a web site that promises a job fair. I’ve been trying to contact them all day, and I haven’t been able to catch anyone in the office. I have a question for them: what companies will be at the fair? Most job/career fair organizers list this information on their website. But not this one. And I need to know who will be there so I can be prepared for that specific company/industry.

So I’ve prepared as best I can. I’ve polished my general resume. I’ve shined my shoes. I’ve pressed my clothes. I’ve selected tasteful, but not trendy or expensive, jewelry. And I’m printing about 20 resumes. I’m thinking about printing 20 more.

It irks me that I can’t prepare specific resumes for each company at the fair. I’d like to be able to target my resume for that specific company. But no. This stupid company doesn’t have a list of the exhibitors on their website.  Did I say AAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!?!!! Let me say it again.

AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!

I hate interviews. Sigh.

UPDATE 4:37PM: So I finally got in touch with the people from the job fair organization. There will be 13 companies there… and not one of them are engineering firms. Only two of them are not security related. So of the 13, I can’t apply for jobs at 11 of them because I don’t have security clearance. Shit.

And the other two? One is an insurance firm and the other is a satellite TV service provider. I’ve been to their websites and they aren’t looking for civil engineers. They’re looking for people with project management experience in things like transmission towers and satellite service problems. Neither of which is anywhere near my field of engineering.

AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!

Climate Change Reversal

See? See? I told you so. Twice. The Church of Climate Change didn’t reveal its modeling or methodology for a reason. And that reason is that there are some crazy problems with their climate change models. More and more people/organizations are catching on to the scheme.

I am feeling insufferably proud of myself right now. So much so, some would claim that my ego is now endangering the ozone. (I’m sure it has something to do with hot air or some such thing…)

“Fossil” Fuels

FYI: Laughing your ass off while getting over a serious sinus problem hurts.

And I’ve been laughing for a good thirty minutes.

What’s that, Chicken Little? The sky is falling? Oh really? Are you sure?

Here’s the thing: They never were sure. They used the “global warming” hysteria as a political maneuver to try to bring the US to heel. And they ended up starving a lot of people, wrecking many countries’ economies, and converting a lot of people to the false Church of Global Warming.

And for their next act, they’ll ignore the increasing number of man-made climate change dissenters because the dissenters are obviously in the pocket of Big Mean Ol’ Business.

So where’s my check Big Business? I’m waiting.

UPDATE: HA! Imagine no Global Warming. Cute.

The Smeller’s the Feller

Absence long story short:Sinus stoppage. Benadryl. Light sensitivity. Benadryl. Lightning storms. Power outages. Sinus pain. Benadryl. Thunderstorms. Benadryl. Sinus explosion. Benadryl. A few truck-loads of Kleenex. Benadryl.

The good news is that I can now breathe. The bad news is that I think I blew my brains out my nose sometime in the last week. If you wanted a new post, yay!!!! If you didn’t want a new post about burping and farting, sorry. As is often the case after a prolonged illness, I think what’s left of my brain is stuck on “Bodily Functions”.


My family is rather gross when it comes to bodily functions. I mean, I have two aunts who practically make burping into a familial cross between wine tasting and the Olympics.

“BrrruuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrpP!!!”

“Ooooh. Good one. I give it a 8.25.”

“8.25? Bull. It was at least a 9.5.”

“No way. There was no depth. 8.25.”

“Please. There were subtle undertones of pepperoni and Sprite. And it was loud and long. 9.5.”

“No way. I didn’t smell anything. I don’t care what you tasted. 8.25.”

“I smelled the Dr. Pepper I drank from last night. 9.5.”

“Nice. I’ll revise my score to a 9.0.”

On and on they go. At some point, if I’m around when these two get going with the arguing/scoring, I’ll make a smart ass remark about Russian judges. Which they don’t get because they refuse to acknowledge figure skating as a sport.

Anyway, they’ve been arguing like this since they were kids. Though, I do think the scoring thing is a recent addition, and my fault at that. They were arguing about who had the best after-taco burp when I (a mortified teenager) sarcastically scored it, hoping they’d realize how crazy they are to do this. But no. They liked the idea and have continued on with it ever since.

So my family finds bodily humor something to celebrate. Still, even growing up with whoopee cushions and fart machines and long-burp competitions the norm, I was mortified last week to find myself the victim of a serious after-Burger King gas attack. I have to tell you, Oust couldn’t touch this. Ozium sat down and cried. My scented candles had a nervous breakdown. And lighting a match did nothing but cause unimaginable distress to the rest of the poor matches (so much so that they all committed suicide via candle), so horrible was the attack.

All in all, I give it a 9.2.